a novella by Nina R. Thrasher
The calm sleep of day I do desire, for the nights terrify me. An endless torture of dreams I wish to call nightmares are simply my own lustful thoughts. My stomach churns with the ache of unsatisfied desire.
Sorrow sits deep within me.
The jewels that once were my beautiful considerations, my innocent imaginings, are smashed upon the floor now. Fate hates me as much as I hate it. I want to walk long hours in the rain so no one can see my tears as they fall continually, dripping down onto my breast. I sit in seeming repose, but all I ever want to do is smoke another cigarette.
And so we meet again.
***
He wasn’t so very tall. About 5′10″ and thin. It was his hair that attracted me first. This brilliant mass of colors seemingly arranged in a most haphazard way. Lovely browns, reds, and various shades of blond meshed together. His face was long and angular, it’s paleness interrupted by very full lips and intense, hooded eyes. I can’t remember their exact color. Blue or green or gray. He had a way of not looking directly at you, though in reality little escaped his stare. You just didn’t know it. I remember him in explicit detail as on the first night we met, except for the eyes.
Damn, I can never remember the eyes.
***